I have a bad habit of always apologizing, no matter what the situation is. I could be walking in the mall, paying attention to my surroundings and all of a sudden someone distracted bumps into me. I tense up, turn red and all of a sudden i apologize..but why? I constantly apologize for everything I do. I vividly remembering walking in the store with a friend, and apologizing when someone bumped into me. My friend looked at me puzzled, and said “why do you always apologize”. I shrugged, then began to wonder the same thing.
I’ve always been a lonely person, I craved validation, so I would always please everyone. That meant saying things that were unnecessary, such as apologizing in situations that I did not need to apologize for. I think saying sorry, for situations that I was not at fault for, would please others, and made me more likable. Recently I saw a post on social media that changed my views on how i want to express my sorrow to others. It said “Instead of saying sorry, say thank you. Instead of saying sorry I’m late, say thank you for waiting for me. Instead of saying sorry I’m so emotional, say thank you for sticking with me through the hard times.”
Like I said earlier, I have a bad habit of putting other people’s needs before my own and constantly pleasing everyone. Being the shy, timid person I am, I was afraid of what other people thought of me, and wanted to be liked by everyone. I realized now, that it should not matter what other people think of me. I’m a positive and kind person, and if someone does not like me, then that’s not my problem. I’ve learned to stop being insecure of my actions and decisions, if i mess up, I brush it off and get back up.
Putting your needs before others is important. At the end of the day, the only person who is going to be there for you, is you. Learning to be confident in yourself, is tough and challenging. It was a challenge, i thought i could never complete, but was able too. (And you will be able to complete it as well!)